Sports & Society

The Boston Red Sox had few fans nearly 50 years ago. Fewer admit being fans back in 1963 and 1964. Few fans of today were alive back then. Those seasons were the Dark Ages of Red Sox lore. 

Do you remember Kevin Costner's famous line from the 1989 film Field of Dreams: "Build it and he will come"?

Well, Pepsi Max took this sentiment to heart when they turned an old warehouse into a cornfield for a new series of soft drink commercials that spoofed the classic baseball flick.

While Shoeless Joe Jackson doesn't appear in any of the three short television spots, the résumés of those who did are long enough to satisfy even the most enthusiastic baseball fanatic.

Just when local sportswriters were trying to come up with some new headlines for the Red Sox losing streak, the team came up with a win, negating hours of hard work by writers across the nation.

Pessimistic Sox-haters will say it’s only one game. They may go into another tailspin and the following headlines remain fitting and proper with a horrendous start.

Some of the headlines considered by hard-working sportswriters and editors include:

It was once about scorecards, home runs and hot dogs. Bobbleheads, mascots and funny-smelling urinals at Wrigley Field.

Fan giveaways, thousands of identical Derek Jeter jerseys, and the odd "Kiss Cam" that would pair two swamp ogres and force them to smooch.

Baseball used to be about all of those things. It was fun. It was part of the game. A tradition that had withstood the test of time.

A testament that could draw a smile from Babe Ruth himself. Baseball was always warm and fuzzy.

Mad Magazine should feature Manny Ramirez on their covers. He’s one of the original Boston Red Sox Idiots. And, now we have confirmation he is crazy as a Looney Toon.

Imagine having been banned once for 50 games for using a forbidden substance, and then to use the proverbial putative something again.

Imagine being so stupid that you are caught once more with hormones, steroids or the creeping crud inside you.

Actually it’s a big goose egg.

Ooohh noooo, and six, but no eggroll goes with it for the Boston Red Sox.

Not since the Stock Market Crash of 1929 has prosperity disappeared so quickly in Red Sox Nation.

Variety announced its famous headline regarding Wall Street, way back when, and you can look it up, as Yogi Berra might say.

How does Major League Baseball grade for diversity in 2011—64 years after Jackie Robinson broke the color line? 

Take a walk with me along the river of my thoughts and grading scale, and you’ll probably be able to pick my brain for the answer by this column’s end.

No longer just a buzzword in college business classes, diversity is a must in almost every walk of global corporate life. 

If you want to know why the hobgoblins of 1989’s Field of Dreams refused to allow Ty Cobb to play ball on their ghostly field, you have only to re-watch the classic 1994 movie Cobb, starring the inimitable Tommy Lee Jones.

Alas, one was the lovely, tear-jerking movie that men loved to bawl about. The other was an antidote to sugarcoated cotton candy about life and death that Field of Dreams provided.

Barry Bonds is in trouble. With his perjury trial underway, Bonds faces a maximum of 10 years in prison, as well as the tarnishing of his legacy. As if it wasn't already.

For three years we have waited for this. The date was March 2011, and everyone in San Francisco and anyone growing up with an awareness of Bonds would remember that date. The day is finally here.

Craftsbury, Vermont, nestled in the forests of northern New England, is famous for two movies filmed on location: one film was made by Alfred Hitchcock, and the other stars Bill "Spaceman" Lee.

Alfred Hitchcock, The Master of Suspense who brought us Psycho and The Birds, went to Craftsbury in 1954. He was attracted to the rural small-town setting where for a few weeks in the autumn, the foliage and splash of colors roll over the hills for miles in every direction.